Kicking Off #29DaysOfBlackness

Today is February 1st. And, I am so excited!!!  In the midst of all the craziness happening in this country to black people in America, I have decided to take the time this year to truly celebrate and honor Black History Month by loudly and proudly sharing my love for black people, business, culture, and history here on this blog and out in the real world.

I plan to be #veryblack. Unapologetically black. Happily black. Twirling in the magic of my blackness. For the entire month of February, I will be wearing clothing and accessories that are either created by black business owners or featuring black culture and/or people. I will also be featuring some of my favorite black authors, entertainers, poets, and creatives. And, to top things off, every week I will be spotlighting black folks doing and achieving amazing things in a "Black Excellence" post.

I think this is a great way to open up dialogue about the richness of black American culture and history, and to also educate the uneducated about the many contributions that black folks have made to help build this country.

Despite what some crazy confused fools have been saying in the media, Black History Month is very much needed---maybe more now than ever. I love my blackness (and yours too).

So, I invite all of you--and I mean all of you, regardless of race or ethnicity--- to join me in celebrating #29DaysofBlackness.

#29DaysOfBlackness Outfit of the Day:

Unboxing: Influenster Cheers To You Voxbox

I love getting new things, especially when I get those those things for free. One of the best things of living in a digital world is how easy it makes it to get receive free products from companies in exchange for reviewing and sharing their newest products on your social media accounts.

1. Influenster 

Influenster is the go-to destination for trendsetters who want to be rewarded for their influence. Qualified members gain access to the latest products, share their expert opinions and spread the word on their favorite discoveries.

Why I Love Them:

I have gotten a variety of great products from Influenster, including Beanitos chips, Rimmel London mascara, Swiss Miss hot chocolate mix, Jergens moisturizer, Skinnygirl snack bars, barkThins, Blue Diamond cashews, and most recently YSL lipsticks and c. Booth bath products. Many of the products that I have received I had never used before and ended up liking them so much I added them to my monthly shopping list. 

Join me, Toya T's referral link: 

www.influenster.com/r/328764

Lemme Get This Off My Chest 4.0: Is Trump Trying To Make America Great Again With Segregation?

I'm going to start calling this #TherapyThursdays because I always feel better after I get these things off my chest.

This week on "Lemme Get This Off My Chest," I try to unravel the enigma wrapped in a turd wrapped in ignorance that is Donald J. Trump, particularly his popular campaign slogan. What does he mean by "making America great again"?

Toya T's Soul JukeBox: "Something in My Heart" (remake) by V Bozeman

If you are fan of Empire, then V Bozeman's beautiful voice and face should be familiar to you. If you don't know her, it is okay because I am here to make the introduction.

Here is her version of the 90's R&B classic "Something in My Heart," originally sung by Michel'le.

Lemme Get This Off My Chest 3.0: I Hate Stacey Dash/Stupid People

Actress Stacey Dash showed her

whole entire ass on Fox News

, calling for getting rid of BET, BET Awards, NAACP awards, and BLACK HISTORY MONTH in the name of racial integration. I couldn't go into the weekend with this fire on my chest. This is me letting go and letting God deal with this stupid woman.

He Had A Dream: Honoring Martin Luther King Jr.

On this day honoring the life and legacy of Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., I want to share a song that I learned at St. Francis De Sales summer camp in Roxbury, MA many years ago.  I am not sure of the song's title or writer. But, I am remember all of the words and plan to pass this song on to my own children one day. 

He had a dream. 

A wonderful dream. 

His name was Martin Luther King.

A preacher man was he. 

He marched for mankind. 

He died for freedom. 

Saying "We shall overcome." 

Yes.

We shall overcome. 

** pictures taken at Martin Luther King, Jr. Memorial in Washington, D.C.

F#ck Relationship Goals, These Are Life Goals

I am so tired of women posting pictures of men and their girlfriends/wives hugged up on a beach or posing for Instagram and then hash tagging them as their "relationship goals." You know what I am talking about it. Okay. There are on a beach. Okay they look cute together. But what does this say about their relationship. I like cute lovey pictures too, but give me something "real".

When I saw this scene below in the movie Creed (2015), I immediately hash tagged it (in my head) as my "life goals". You can keep your staged, strolling down the beach couples pictures. Give me a relationship in which my man is helping me untangle my hair as we speak about life. Yes, Jesus! What are your relationship/life goals?


http://isaacoscar.tumblr.com/post/135913985948/so-my-plan-has-always-just-been-to-do-what-i-love

#BlackGirlMagic Anthem: "Masterpiece" By Jazmine Sullivan

If you have not listened to Jazmine Sullivan's latest album "Reality Show," you need to run to your nearest music store (online or physical) and get it. She has crafted a beautiful album, with ballads, slow jams, uptempo dance joints, and self-love anthems. 

Today, I couldn't get her beautifully written and sung record, "Masterpiece." This is one of my favorite songs on the album. A "black girl magic" anthem. Jazmine sings about loving and accepting yourself---flaws and all---for the masterpiece that you are. 

Read the song lyrics and then check out a video of Jazmine performing an acoustic version of the song. 

Masterpiece by Jazmine Sullivan 

My eyes ain't used to these rays

I'm feeling exposed, but I can't hide no more

I can't hide

As the sun shines on all of my glory

My flaws don't look so bad at all

What was I so afraid of?

Every part of me is a vision of a portrait

Of Mona, of Mona Lisa

Every part of me is beautiful

And I finally see I'm a work of art

A masterpiece

Who is this I've tried so long find?

Filling my heads with lies that I'm not good enough

Then I heard something in my ear

Tell me I'm perfect, now that I know the truth

Time to show and prove

Every part of me is a vision of a portrait

Of Mona, of Mona Lisa

Every part of me is beautiful

And I finally see I'm a work of art

A masterpiece

And now I see the pretty colors on my canvas

I'm a work of art, a Mona Lisa

I'll share my picture with the world

Not afraid to let it show anymore

I can light the night, shine so bright

(Let my colors paint the sky)

I can light the night, shine so bright

(There is beauty in my eyes)

I can light the night, shine so bright

(And I can see it now, I believe it now, I can feel it now)

I can light the night, shine so bright

(Want the world to see, I'm a work of art. I'm a masterpiece)

I can light the night, shine so bright

(I am beautiful)

Every part of me is a vision of a portrait

Of Mona, of Mona Lisa

Every part of me is beautiful

And I finally see I'm a work of art

A masterpiece

What I Am Reading: Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes

It's a new new year, time to add a new book to my reading list. New Year.  If you have been following my "What I am Reading" series here on Figure Out Your Life blog, then you know that during the fall I began a movie-to-book themed reading series---that is, reading books that were the source material for movies that I have seen. I ended 2015 with the page-turning, and amazingly well adapted-to-a-movie, book "Gone Girl" by Gillian Flynn. Check out my other book reviews

here

.

In the spirit of starting off the new year right, I have decided to change up things and read an inspirational book. My first book of the year is "Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun, and Be Your Own Person" by creator of tv shows "Grey's Anatomy," "Scandal," and "How to Get Away with Murder,"and queen mother of #TGIT (Thank God It's Thursday) on ABC, Shonda Rhimes. 

I am at the very end of this book and I love it. It is funny, insightful, and inspiring. Shonda brings us in her world and holds nothing back, as she recounts her one year journey of saying "yes" to everything that made her scared, nervous, and uncomfortable. During that year, she lost 127lbs, made the commencement speech at her alma mater Dartmouth College, got closer to her family and friends, shed some toxic friends, covered magazines, to name a few of the things she did once she stopped saying "no." My favorite chapters are "Say Yes to No" and "Say Yes to Who I Am." I have already bookmarked those chapters and I am sure I will going back to them over the course of this year when I need a boost. Highly recommend this book!!! Get it today---the ebook, paperback, hardcover, or the audiobook. 

Book Summary: 

In this poignant, hilarious, and deeply intimate call to arms, Hollywood’s most powerful woman, the mega-talented creator of Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal and executive producer of How to Get Away with Murder reveals how saying YES changed her life—and how it can change yours too.

She’s the creator and producer of some of the most groundbreaking and audacious shows on television today:

Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal, How to Get Away with Murder

. Her iconic characters—Meredith Grey, Cristina Yang, Olivia Pope, Annalise Keating—live boldly and speak their minds. So who would suspect that Shonda Rhimes, the mega talent who owns Thursday night television (#TGIT), is an introvert? That she hired a publicist so she could

avoid

public appearances? That she hugged walls at splashy parties and suffered panic attacks before media interviews so severe she remembered nothing afterward?

Before her Year of Yes, Shonda Rhimes was an expert at declining invitations others would leap to accept. With three children at home and three hit television shows on TV, it was easy to say that she was simply too busy. But in truth, she was also afraid. Afraid of cocktail party faux pas like chucking a chicken bone across a room; petrified of live television appearances where Shonda Rhimes could trip and fall and bleed out right there in front of a live studio audience; terrified of the difficult conversations that came so easily to her characters on-screen. In the

before

, Shonda’s introvert life revolved around burying herself in work, snuggling her children, and comforting herself with food.

And then, on Thanksgiving 2013, Shonda’s sister muttered something that was both a wake up and a call to arms:

You never say yes to anything.

The comment sat like a grenade, until it detonated. Then Shonda, the youngest of six children from a supremely competitive family, knew she had to embrace the challenge: for one year, she would say YES to everything that scared her.

This poignant, intimate, and hilarious memoir explores Shonda’s life

before

her Year of Yes—from her nerdy, book-loving childhood creating imaginary friends to her devotion to creating television characters who reflected the world she saw around her (like Cristina Yang, whose ultimate goal wasn’t marriage, and Cyrus Beene, who is a Republican

and

gay). And it chronicles her life

after

her Year of Yes had begun—when Shonda forced herself out of the house and onto the stage, appearing on

Jimmy Kimmel Live

, and giving the Dartmouth Commencement speech; when she learned to say yes to her health, yes to play and she stepped out of the shadows and into the sun; when she learned to explore, empower, applaud, and love her truest self. Yes.

This wildly candid and compulsively readable book reveals how the mega talented Shonda Rhimes, an unexpected introvert, achieved badassery worthy of a Shondaland character. And how you can, too. 

**book summary taken from: http://books.simonandschuster.com/Year-of-Yes/Shonda-Rhimes/9781476777092

Try Audible and Get Two Free Audiobooks

Making New Year's Resolutions (Out of Last Year's Resolutions)

It is 2016. A brand new year, a chance for a brand new start... (pause)

Reflecting on 2015, it was actually a pretty great year for me. Although I did not accomplish all of my five new year's resolutions for 2015, I can't say that I want to change much for 2016. I think  revising or tweaking some things in my life may be the better choice than changing them.

So, let's review my five new year's resolutions from the previous year:

1. Get a jobB (i.e., job with benefits)

 I really tried on this one. Sent out tons and tons of resumes. Got all the way to final round but no dice. I guess it was not my year for a job with benefits. But, I did get a lead on a few good ones for the next year so....I will say this goal is in a work in progress.

2. Be in a long, healthy, happy relationship

Yes. I am still single (sorry mummy and daddy). But, the men I dated were not right for me. One guy was very nice but not interested in anything I liked to do. Another was celibate indefinitely but wanted to spank me (WTF, bro?). Another was a

unreliable, inconsiderate, self-centered man

 Fuck Boy. I am not interested in sacrificing my happiness and self-worth to "have a man."

However, if you want to get technical,  I did kinda accomplish this goal. This past year I was in a very long, loving, and healthy relationship with myself. Toya T and I went on many amazing adventures together. We laughed, we cried, we watched Netflix and chilled, and we ate some yummy food. So, I am going to reward myself for this one. Yay to me!!! This year I am going to add "with a man" to end of the resolution and hope for an equally successful outcome.

3. Move into my own place

Fail! I still live at home with my mummy. But, I don't pay rent...so Yay!! Adding this one onto the 2016 list (without revisions).

4. Travel some place new internationally and domestically

Success! Goal! Touchdown! I traveled to 2 continents and 8 countries in 2015, including my first trip to Asia. It was definitely a year of travel. I saw some amazing things, ate some yummy foods, and made some great memories. This goal is getting added to the 2016 (without revisions).

5. Tone up and get back into a size 8

This one did not happen. I started and stopped several times but just couldn't keep a momentum. Though I am the biggest I have ever been,  I have learned to not beat myself up about it. I am still fly, even as Juicy T. And, this is just a challenge that I have to spend a little extra effort and time on in 2016.

Overall, I may not have accomplished all of my resolutions, but I have definitely laid the groundwork to achieve them in the future; hopefully 2016 will be that year.